my first ten days..

Well, let me start this off by saying that it may be a little lengthy, so i will not be offended if you don't read all this. I actually wont know if you don't read any of it... and thats alright too. This is for my supporters and friends that want to know what i'm doing over here in cotonue. I also have to put a disclaimer... so here it is:

I serve with Mercy Ships. Everything here, however, is my personal opinion and is not read or approved before it is posted. Opinions, conclusions and other information expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of Mercy Ships.

Okay, so i left home August 11th 5:00 pm and arrived here august 12th, 11:00 PM (benin time, were five hours ahead) it was a lengthy trip-- nothing extrodinary really happened on the way over, besides of course me not knowing french and being at the airport in paris. :/ you know how we tak louder and slower to people in english when they don't speak english? yes, well they were doing the same thing to me in french, and let me just tell you- it doesn't help. I arrived here, put my bags on the ground and went to sleep. It was the strangest feeling.. finaly being here-- laying in a bed i'd lay in for the next five months. I had looked forward to and talked about this day for many months, and it was finally happening. I didn't quite know what to do with myself. I woke up the next morning and met with miss Mary Lou-- she is my boss of sorts on the ship. She gave me a tour of the dining room, and told me what i was going to be doing. I'm kindof bad at telling stories, and i don't really know how to do this blogging thing correctly. So i apologize in advance. What i do exactly is work in the dining room-- on my working days i go to work at six and set up breakfast, and serve breakfast, then clean everything up.. and i do the same for lunch and dinner. we have one or two hour breaks in between each meal.. so the days i work i am really tired. on my off days I have different things i can do.. i can stay on the ship and do whatever i want, i spend alot of time on deck eight-- the top deck, watcing the other boats and looking out at the sea. I send you all a hello and a prayer quite often across those waters. I can go into the city with mercy ministries-- to the orphanage, the psychiatric hospital, the agricultural center, or to visit the prisons. I can also just go into the city and look at the markets, or go on a walk... you always have to be with someone though, preferably a boy if you are of the female gender. We can also go to the beach, but we cannot swim, it's really dirty, and someobody stepped on a needle there last week :/ i went in and played volleyball one night with a group of people. every tuesday night there is a volleyball game, every friday night there is an ultimate frisbee game, and there is also a soccer team on board. there are alot of things to do... o! and there are overnight trips you can take, I would really like to go in with the group that shows Jesus films, they go out into villages and set up a Jesus film and then talk to people about it.. i think it would be really interesting to get out into the more rural areas of benin. o there is so much to write i don't quite know where to begin... I'll try to break it into sections.

Cultural differences:
well.. it's interesting living on this ship. there are thiry two different countries represented here, almost everyone you meet is from a different place, and almost everyone has a different accent. it makes it a little hard to communicate sometimes. you learn to talk slower, and not use a whole lot of difficult words after a while. I might come home talking pretty simply. it truly is a miracle that everyone can live together here without many problems. My room mates are dorothea (switzerland) Lea (Germany) Michelle (Canada) Eleanor (UK) Kate (australia) and Chelsea (North carolina) before Chelsea was here it was Naomi and she was from ireland... so we were all from different countries.. all have very different back grounds, but so far we've all lived together just fine. It's interesting living here, because it's not really any one culture i'm learning about-- i'm learning about so many different ones. we all make up one big interesting one together. In the actual city it is really interesting to be the minority. I've never really experianced that before. I am staring at the people of cotonue.. carrying baskets around on their heads, and babies on their backs and they are staring at me-- the white girl, carrying her bag on her arm wearing wierd, bland clothes. people stare at you alot. and they always say the local word for white person.. and the children come up sometimes and touch your skin. they think it might be different feeling i think. It's funny. One day I had been called a white girl about twenty times on my way back to the ship that when a little girl same up to me and called me that i looked at her, looked at my skin and acted like i was completely shocked by what i saw. she just started laughing really hard.. and her mother just smiled at me. it was kindof a funny moment. it might have been a thing where you had to be there... most people here are pretty friendly. I've become friends with alot of the day workers, they're from benin, and we pay them to work on the ship during the day. There is alot of poverty here-- most people live in shacks, or on the streets. alot of the fisherman just live in their boats... or canoes. and there is not a sewage system really.. not one that they use at least. people just go to the restroom on the streets-- so you have to be careful where you walk. if someone has to go, it's just down with their pants in front of everybody.. that's something i'm not quite sure i'll get used to. I was sitting on the top deck one day reading when i heard some yelling, so i looked up and saw a canoe full of naked men... just jumpin into the water, taking a bath. i was like, well.. "good morning benin!" ha.

Orphanage
I went to the orphanage on my first off day. We pulled up, were greeted by the translater and were brought to the children. we were there to entertain them basicaly while one of the women from the ship taught computer lessons. There were about fifteen infants, and five toddlers. I picked up a baby at first, and this little boy came over and grabbed onto my leg.. his name is miracle-- he was thrown into a well by his mother and left to die. alot of the babies there were left by the ocean, with the hopes that the tide would take them away, or someone would find them. it's really sad. i put the infant back down and picke up miracle, we walked outside and played on the playground... i won't tell you every single thing we did. at the orphanage though they don't have diapers, so whenever they went to the bathroom they just went on top of you, or in their crib.. and their cribs didn't really get washed out, so they would just lie in their own urine for hours, it broke my heart. I don't know if the people working there didn't care, or if they just had so much to dothat they didn't notice. bath time was interesting-- there are so many babies that they have to wash them in a sort of assembly line. they just put five or six babies in a bucket at a time and dragged them down to the washroom... sprayed them with a hose, scrubbed them down, dragged them back and we set up an assembly line to dry and clothe them all.. i don't think they recieve very much love. I'll be going back to the orphanage whenever i can.. i like that i'm here for a while, because you can build real relationships with the people. The language barrier is kindof difficult, but we have translators, and i'm taking french lessons.

relationships
well.. it's interesting on the ship, and im saying interesting alot.. anyways, no one really comes and goes at the same time.. so people are continually leaving, and there are always new people showing up. So not every one is waiting here on the ship for you with open arms neccesarily. they were nice, bu i felt completely and utterly alone for the first few days. I had no one to talk to really, no one to lean on, i was being broken. I needed to be broken, to wake up. I was used to home, used to comfort.. the comfort of my friends and family.. so God reminded me that he's the only one i can lean on through all of this confusion, and newness. I have made some friends now, Chelsea-- she's from North carolina, and she's doing the same thing I'm doing basicaly. She's really nice and really cool. She loves Jesus very much, and she loves everybody else very much as well. I hope that she rubs off on me, I want to be on fire for God like she is. we're each others accountability partners-- we make each other do devotions.. and be POSITIVE about life. whenever i got here the first thing i realized was that i had this big blanket of negativity surrounding my life back home. and here, everyone else is really positive about things... i used to be like that. I'm hoping that will rb off on me as well. O MY GRACIOUS! i met david miller's old room mates. if you don't know who david miller is he worked on this ship last year in liberia and he's best friends with my brother... so it was really cool to meet some people that knew someone from back home. Their names are Patrick and Tio, I went in town with them and chelsea last night and we got ice cream and talked for a while, it was really fun. Patrick has been dubbed my african big brother, so now i have a protector over here :) hooray! They are both from Ghana. I met a day worker today, I can't remember his name :/ but he is taking me to his local church tomorow. He can speak spanish.. and for some reason I've been wanting to speak in spanish all the time, so i can talk to him. ha it's fun. I am so excited about going to his church tomorrow!! he's taking me on his zimmy john (motor cycle.. i don't know why that's what we call them) i've never ridden on a motorcycle so that should be exciting as well..

Psychiatric Hospital
I went to the psychiatric hospital this morning with a group of people that go every saturday. now when i say psychiatric hospital please erase the picture you have in your head right now of a hospital. it is actually a walled off village within a village where everyone with mental problems is sent to live. there were all different kinds of people, some who obviously were sick-- who talked to people that were't there.. or just sang and yelled all the time. or there were people who looked and acted pretty normal, who only struggled with depression. There were no workers there when we showed up. only the patietnts, and the only worker was inside not doing anything. we walked around the village greeting everyone.. and inviting them to participate in the activity, which was a lesson and singing.. and then a craft. I had been around people with mental problems before, so it wasn't that which shocked me so much. It was the living conditions. They had nothing, nothing but the house over their heads, and a little bit of food. There was a man lying under a tree in his own feces, covered with flies. All of the floors here are dirt, so everythings was dusty, everything was muddy. people just used the bathroom all over the place, and it smelled. They were dirty. They wanted to dance. I have had to learn to not care about any of my articles of clothing i have here, they have been peed on, pooped on (by the babies), and just plain dirty.. I have had to learn to stop caring about cleanliness.. at least when it comes ot people here. they all wanted to hug you, to kiss you, to hold your hand.. and I had to pray pray pray that God would help me look past the way it smelled, past the way it looked there... and see the people as his children-- the ones he loves just as much as everyone else. and he has helped me to do that. we sang and danced together... they think i'm a good dancer. ha. they like to watch white people dance. but not to make fun of us-- which is new.. they just think it's interesting to watch us dance. so i danced for alot of people.. i also turned down a couple proposals today. ha. It was sonya's birthday, so we sang happy birthday to her in korean, english, spanish, german, russian, and french. :) it was fun. About what i was saying about looking past everything to see God's people.. i sent an email to my friend when i went to church in the ward last sunday and i'm going to put part of it here...
"I went to church today in the ward-- with patients and nurses. (i didn't get to go to a local church because I had to work today, and we didn't get finished until 10:30). I walked up to the door semi awkardly because i was late.. and this lady came up and took my arm and sat me down next to this woman holding her daughter who had puss coming out her face, out her nose, out her mouth... it was discusting. I glanced at her, and looked back at the pastor because i thought i was going to vomit. it smelled like blood down there, dried blood, and the girl was making really gross noises while she was just attempting to breathe, i thought i was going to throw up every time i heard her spit into the bucket her mother was holding. i was trying so hard not to show the discust i felt on my face, i prayed, and looked at her. I looked at her right in the eyes and smiled. i felt all my discustedness go away and i just saw a little girl in her mothers arms. She had the most beautiful eyes. she tried to smile back but went into a coughing fit of some sort. i handed her mother a rag to wipe her face. she smiled at me when I left. People are to be treated like people. everyone i meet should feel like they are the most incredible person i have every met. i don't care if they are the ugliest, most discusting, fat, pussing person i know.. i'm going to treat them like everyone else, i'm going to love them like everyone else. That is how i can show love. i can not just sit there and observe their life politely, but become involved in it. it's so interesting that all you have to do is treat someone who feels the farthest thing from normal like a normal person to touch their hearts. I am to enter their world to truly show the love of christ."
So i suppose that is mostly what's going on here.. i have alot more to say, but i don't know how to say it. I love you all.. and i miss you. Open your eyes. Open Your ears. I'm praying for you and I will try to write more later.